Stoicism: The best mind-hack to change your life (It changed mine)

Have you been in a tough spot in your life? Do you want things around you to change but you’re not sure which foot to put forward? Do you think it is high time to give a different lifestyle a try?

Stoicism can be just what you are looking for. Don’t worry this is not a type of living that will require you to build a camp in woods, or tell you to through away all your technology to live a happy life. In fact, according to me — these things are near to impossible seeing the current world scenario. One needs technology and a good lifestyle to live a good life now-a-days. That’s why any new idea about trying to become more minimal and responsible should include this fact.

To put a more realistic definition of Stoicism, to me it is about accepting reality, putting ones ‘need’ above ‘want’ and become more accepting. It is a philosophy of life that aims to minimise the negative aspects in your life and make an individual more opportunistic.

How can one follow Stoicism?

There is no form to fill and wait for an invite. You can wake up one day and decide that you want to be a stoic, however the change becomes when you inculcate the idea in your life too.

Being a stoic requires you to self-reflect on your action, try to keep things minimal, stay away from unnecessary drama that will drain your energy and just live a minimal life.

If a couple of months ago a person would have lied to me or I would have had a bad day at work, my entire day henceforth would be ruined. I would seek solace in isolating myself and even have a hard time getting my thoughts straight. That’s when I heard the first rule of Stoicism.

1. Control your thoughts.

You are the creator of your thoughts and you are also be the destroyer. The more you take things and others opinions of you seriously, the more your thought would be occupied by what others think of you and not what you want to think of yourself. You must know that every person has a different story and a different perception of things, don’t let their opinions shake your pillar of strength. Focus on what is in your control!

This mentality did not come to be in a day, not even in a week, but slowly I could sense my soul calming down. I started becoming a more thoughtful person. I also started speaking less which meant that I think more and only spoke when the situation required me to. Stoicism helps you change your mindset to worry about things that you can change and then act on them

Another problem one faces is the desire to want as many luxurious things as one can have. Huge house, big car, million dollar clothes and what not. But before you make your next purchase, think of this second rule of Stoicism.

2. Ask yourself, ‘Is it necessary?’

There are two type of things people can own, things they need and things they want. Need are things on which your life depends on like — basic clothing, laptops for work, fridge for food, a bed to sleep — just things that help you make your life easier. Things that one want are acts of desire — a designer clothing which you will wear with a fear of getting ruined, a more expensive laptop, a bigger bed even if you have to sleep alone.

Running behind things that you want is life running in a race that has no finish line because there is no end to things you can have. After a week, there will be bigger laptops, bigger cars, bigger beds, bigger houses, bigger desires and the list will go on and on. Now this does not mean that you start living like a nomad, infact desires are good because they make you more motivated to work hard. This act of buying out of an impulse takes a wrong turn when it starts happening frequently and then it becomes natural for you.

This takes me to the third rule I follow in Stoicism

3. Don’t suffer imagined troubles

Which is also to say that What is within us is far more powerful than anything outside of us.

“Waste no time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.”
-Marcus Aurelius

Worrying about your love life, job, past traumas, wellbeing etc. I know it is unimaginably tough to overcome any trauma one has had in their life, I’ve had my share too. However after 5–6 years of having the same fears and troubles in my life, I started to get tired. Being anxious became my natural state and the noises in my head made a permanent home. I realised that what had happened in the past was now dictating my future.

In order for me to come back stronger I had to come to terms with the fact that what happened was wrong but that does not mean what will happen will be too. After waking up, I chanted to myself “I am stronger than I give myself the credit to be. I am more capable than I was yesterday”.

You don’t need to explain how good you are to the world, fight your battle and celebrate your wins. But then also remember the fourth rule of Stoicism

4. Treat your success and failure the same

Again, this does not mean you pop open a champagne when you lose (or maybe do?) and cry your eyes out when you win something. It is all about being humble, optimistic and accepting reality. Once you give up the thought of ‘If this would have happened’ or ‘I wish things were different’, you’ll be creating a false reality for yourself and get hurt. Instead, learn from you failure, observe what you could have done differently and move forward. There is nothing stronger that a person who learns from his mistakes and does not stop chasing their goal.

On the contrary, once you achieve what you’ve been aiming for, stay humble. Don’t let negative emotions like pride consume you. If you’ve read my article about How I turned my life around in 8 months! (Philosophy of ‘The Dip’), you’d know what I mean. If I had gotten comfortable with my minimum wage job, I would not have gotten to my 5 figure job.

“Desire is a contract that you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want.”

Seek discomfort, i.e try to be the best version of yourself each day. Which brings us to the last and my favourite rule Stoicism

5. Love your fate. Your happiness depends on you.

Don’t be in the backseat of your own life. You drive the force. You bring in the positives. You make the choices that define who you are going to be in the next 5 years. Even if things are not going your way, make a plan and work your way upwards. Believe that success is rightfully yours to make the tables turn.

Don’t let materialistic things and your surroundings define your happiness. Sit in an empty room in silence, without any music, without doing anything, just meditate for 5 minutes and see how different you’ll be the next month. Once you learn to be at peace with yourself, once you can sit in silence with only your thoughts, no once can bring you down.

Thank you for reading my content. I talk about philosophy, productivity and self-improvent. I also create notion template for developers, students and productivity fanatics. Get to know about each new blog by subscribing to emails!

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